Sunday, March 30, 2008
One Hundred and Thirty-two, Pi AM... mmmm...Pie
I had dinner with Woodwind and Lord Chaos (vegetarian Hoagie for me!). We enjoyed catching the second half of "Catch Me If You Can" on ABC. We laughed at the Lighting of the Candles on the Awesome chocolate cake. We enjoyed "The Reaping." And throughout it all, we talked about all sorts of stuff, things that had nothing to do with school or deadlines. Stuff that had to do with the important things, like life.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
One Hundred and Thirty-one, Four Weeks
I haven't seen some of my closest friends in person in almost a month... I miss them so I think I'll spend tomorrow (which means today since it is already Saturday) with some of them.
In other news, if I go into end-of-life health care it will be very difficult for me. I'd be honored to do it, but it would definitely be hard for me.
In final news, I'm bad at expressing myself. It's something I should figure out and work on but never really feel comfortable facing my own issues.
In other news, if I go into end-of-life health care it will be very difficult for me. I'd be honored to do it, but it would definitely be hard for me.
In final news, I'm bad at expressing myself. It's something I should figure out and work on but never really feel comfortable facing my own issues.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
One Hundred and Thirty, Gore Galore!
I'd like to take a second to warn you the following excerpt is very graphic.
"They didn't take it on the lam weirdly inside a cloud the way Clevinger had done. They didn't explode into blood and clotted matter. They didn't drown or get struck by lightning, mangled by machinery or crushed in landslides. They didn't get shot to death in hold-ups, strangled to death in rapes, stabbed to death in saloons, bludgeoned to death with axes by parents or children, or die summarily by some other act of God. Nobody choked to death. People bled to death like gentlemen in an operating room or expired without comment in an oxygen tent. There was none of that tricky now-you-see-me-now-you-don't business so much in vogue outside the hospital, none of that now-I-am-and-now-I-ain't. There were no famines or floods. Children didn't suffocate in cradles or iceboxes or fall under trucks. No one was beaten to death. People didn't stick their heads into ovens with the gas on, jump in front of subway trains or come plummeting like dead weights out of hotel windows with a whoosh!, accelerating at the rate of thirty-two feet per second to land with a hideous plop! on the sidewalk and die disgustingly there in public like an alpaca sack full of hairy strawberry ice cream, bleeding, pink toes awry."
I think it's odd that I've read Catch-22 twice and both times the same paragraph stopped me cold with the descriptions held therein. It's not a simple matter of saying that people outside of the hospitals in the war die quite unpleasantly. Different deaths, both inside and outside hospitals, are described in detail to show how the outside world is crazier than the inside world. And I love it. The last sentence really does draw me in for some odd reason (maybe the ice cream and italicized words) and makes me stop after reading it and think to myself, "Wow, how cool!" Note that this is strictly talking about how immersing the paragraph is, not necessarily the different methods of death described within the paragraph.
I'm hungry.
"They didn't take it on the lam weirdly inside a cloud the way Clevinger had done. They didn't explode into blood and clotted matter. They didn't drown or get struck by lightning, mangled by machinery or crushed in landslides. They didn't get shot to death in hold-ups, strangled to death in rapes, stabbed to death in saloons, bludgeoned to death with axes by parents or children, or die summarily by some other act of God. Nobody choked to death. People bled to death like gentlemen in an operating room or expired without comment in an oxygen tent. There was none of that tricky now-you-see-me-now-you-don't business so much in vogue outside the hospital, none of that now-I-am-and-now-I-ain't. There were no famines or floods. Children didn't suffocate in cradles or iceboxes or fall under trucks. No one was beaten to death. People didn't stick their heads into ovens with the gas on, jump in front of subway trains or come plummeting like dead weights out of hotel windows with a whoosh!, accelerating at the rate of thirty-two feet per second to land with a hideous plop! on the sidewalk and die disgustingly there in public like an alpaca sack full of hairy strawberry ice cream, bleeding, pink toes awry."
I think it's odd that I've read Catch-22 twice and both times the same paragraph stopped me cold with the descriptions held therein. It's not a simple matter of saying that people outside of the hospitals in the war die quite unpleasantly. Different deaths, both inside and outside hospitals, are described in detail to show how the outside world is crazier than the inside world. And I love it. The last sentence really does draw me in for some odd reason (maybe the ice cream and italicized words) and makes me stop after reading it and think to myself, "Wow, how cool!" Note that this is strictly talking about how immersing the paragraph is, not necessarily the different methods of death described within the paragraph.
I'm hungry.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
One Hundred and Twenty-nine, A Book from my Childhood
Apparently they made The Giver into a play. Nothing Broadway-sized but a little play designed for grade schoolers to watch after they've read the book and discussed it in class. I hope to see a story I like done in a different manner.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
One Hundred and Twenty-eight, The Beauty of Rest
This morning I helped with the physical conundrums of throwing a fundraising 5k run/walk. I had to be there at six in the morn...Yeah, it was tough. The adrenaline from being standing kept most of us going strong but towards the end, it began hitting a lot of us. Not that we looked like sleeping idiots during it, but we could tell our energies were flagging more than they should. Over lunch Amish Girl was getting sleepy-eyed and when I returned during Warcraft, my head would nod off. So I headed off to bed promptly fell asleep for four hours. I'm curious how this will mess with my sleeping schedule, if at all. We'll see!
Friday, March 21, 2008
One Hundred and Twenty-seven, Glass Houses and Match Days
Some days the muse just isn't with me. Ok, so usually the muse isn't with me but at least the thought-god/dess is. I briefly considered writing about this great speaker we had today who gave us practical advice on working in the hospitals and impressing our elders. He also changed from his professional-wear into a Superman suit during his presentation. But I just didn't know where to go with it despite the interesting point he made about all doctors living in a Glass House and professional manners and perception meaning a great deal. So eventually I threw that aside. A friend suggested talking about the awkward moments created by Tucker's red rocket. I haven't really encountered them personally so I'd have no stories to write about it plus in my mind, it's just a dog with his proper biology working. It wasn't like he was doing anything, it was just there. So that didn't grab my mental thought stream for proper writing. My last attempt was going to be about Match Day (which was yesterday). This magical day is the day in March when all fourth year medical students around the country find out where they were placed for their residencies. In case that was confusing, it's where they get their job assignments as freshly minted doctors. The place where they'll slave away their first couple years as the bottom of the totem poles again. While many got placed at my school, I saw a few far-flung ones associated with names I recognized on the list. My high school valedictorian is off to Dallas and the University of Texas. Other fourth years I know are heading to Portland, Maine and Chapel Hill, NC. And many other places elsewhere. But beyond mentioning that, there was no thought going on about my future with Match Day or where I'd like to be placed. Hopefully you'll be reading more about that in a year and a half.
So I leave you with apologies on the lack of content here. Then again, I did write something, didn't I? And it did give you an idea of what is important enough to me to mention: Third & Fourth Year, my friend's suggestion, Residency Decisions.
So I leave you with apologies on the lack of content here. Then again, I did write something, didn't I? And it did give you an idea of what is important enough to me to mention: Third & Fourth Year, my friend's suggestion, Residency Decisions.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
One Hundred and Twenty-six, Reflections in Front of Me
My head is split in two, approximately half and half. On one side I see a large doorway leading to a dark place with the kind of clutter that brings you down and keeps your head in the ground. On the other side I see a bright exit lit with the bright glow of the the sun shouting at us from the heavens. The left side has some of that light shown but the dark doorway stands there sinisterly. Metallic appendages crawl over the surface along with a pink-ribboned container holding rock candy. The right side's window continues to shed light onto half of my face showing the branches outside. I see long gashes though, even on this bright side, that show minutes of attention from a canine. Above the images in the right corner, I see in simple letters, "POLARIZED."
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
One Hundred and Twenty-five, The Horizon Cometh
I've been very successful putting off any major decisions in my life. I had to choose a degree program back in high school so I chose "doctor" which gave me a minimum of eight years before I had to worry about the real world. On top of that I chose a five year Masters of Engineering program as my undergraduate degree choice so I had nine years of school to look forward to. In the deal, I got an extra year when I wasn't accepted to medical school my first go-around. Being denied to all my medical schools was one of the best things ever to happen to me! Managed to travel all over the place that year and get in medical experience at a local hospital. Now here I am approaching eight years since I graduated high school. Yes, the real world scares me.
I do have major decisions approaching fast these upcoming two years. They seem to be coming from all over. The largest one that's been staring me in the face and that everybody has asked me about is what specialty I'll pursue in medicine. Everyone tells me they get their ideas during third year when they begin actual rotations. I hope it comes to me as well during that time period.
It'll be a time of moving around and meeting tons of new people many of whom I'll end up forgetting (no matter how hard I try). I even have some away rotations in the works where I'll go to different parts of the state. While trying to learn as much as I can, I'll also be trying to figure out what aspects of each rotation grabs my interest and which goals in life I want to be able to do while working in a particular field. And therein lies the kicker. In my life, I will work really hard at being a doctor, but for me it will never surpass the goal of being a family man. So even if I find some field interesting or engaging, it will be for naught if I can't have a fulfilling home life as well. Again, I trust that the choices I make will be correct whether I agree with them at the time or not. I can attest to the fact that while I have no luck at petty gambling, I have all the luck when it comes to the big things in life.
I do have major decisions approaching fast these upcoming two years. They seem to be coming from all over. The largest one that's been staring me in the face and that everybody has asked me about is what specialty I'll pursue in medicine. Everyone tells me they get their ideas during third year when they begin actual rotations. I hope it comes to me as well during that time period.
It'll be a time of moving around and meeting tons of new people many of whom I'll end up forgetting (no matter how hard I try). I even have some away rotations in the works where I'll go to different parts of the state. While trying to learn as much as I can, I'll also be trying to figure out what aspects of each rotation grabs my interest and which goals in life I want to be able to do while working in a particular field. And therein lies the kicker. In my life, I will work really hard at being a doctor, but for me it will never surpass the goal of being a family man. So even if I find some field interesting or engaging, it will be for naught if I can't have a fulfilling home life as well. Again, I trust that the choices I make will be correct whether I agree with them at the time or not. I can attest to the fact that while I have no luck at petty gambling, I have all the luck when it comes to the big things in life.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
One Hun'red and Twenty-four, Texan-speak!
As my travel partner pointed out in the previous entry's comment section, we learned some new words while down south thanks to the Engineer. We had fun with them so here they are in no particular order!
doing = durin'
ex. How you durin'? How's your Momma* durin'?
Texans are always "fixin" to do stuff.
ex. I'm fixin to go to work and my Momma's* fixin to take care of my dog!!
dumping = tumping
ex. Well, I'm fixin to tump your Momma* dear son/daughter/offspring.
poke/ticklish jab = joog (spelling is approximated)
ex. You'd better not be fixin to tump my Momma* or I'll joog you!
hundred = hun'red
ex. This'll be the last time I ask how yer Momma's* durin' because I'm fixin to live through a hun'red lives before I interact with that woman I'm tumping, joog or no joog!
*always ask about Momma!
doing = durin'
ex. How you durin'? How's your Momma* durin'?
Texans are always "fixin" to do stuff.
ex. I'm fixin to go to work and my Momma's* fixin to take care of my dog!!
dumping = tumping
ex. Well, I'm fixin to tump your Momma* dear son/daughter/offspring.
poke/ticklish jab = joog (spelling is approximated)
ex. You'd better not be fixin to tump my Momma* or I'll joog you!
hundred = hun'red
ex. This'll be the last time I ask how yer Momma's* durin' because I'm fixin to live through a hun'red lives before I interact with that woman I'm tumping, joog or no joog!
*always ask about Momma!
Monday, March 17, 2008
One Hundred and Twenty-three, Things I Recall
- "Defying Gravity" from Wicked the musical
- some of the longest bridges I've been on are in Louisiana
- Don't stay in Gretna
- Museums close early on Sunday in New Orleans
- Getting lost in northwest New Orleans
- yells in the middle of the night
- freakishly empty restaurant
- a car being pushed along by another car
- too many onions in one day
- the video game city of Houston (looks like nighttime downtowns in first person shooters)
- the largest puppy I ever loved (no, I'm not calling him fat)
- puppy logs!
- the Airport departing gate traffic Nazi which combined with
- the Engineer's neck crick proved to be quite humorous (after the events that transpired)
- The Hobbit Cafe! Yay!
- Restaurant waiter/waitress issues
- the Gregarious Kid during Egyptian Rat Screw...scary!
- the Engineer's magic trick with his glass of smoothie and a paper towel
- Hairspray (yes the movie with Travolta dressed as a woman!)
- BRAWL! (Smash Bros.)
- No World of Warcraft! (by choice)
- Losing my voice
- Watching the Kid touch her eye to point out the location of the lacrimal duct when she hadn't washed her hands after eating stuff with jalapenos.
- Crone-voice (myself when I didn't have a real voice)
- Coffee with my friends near a railroad when I barely had a voice
- Getting excited as we came upon the last hour of our trip
- Falling onto a bed for ten minutes post-trip
- some of the longest bridges I've been on are in Louisiana
- Don't stay in Gretna
- Museums close early on Sunday in New Orleans
- Getting lost in northwest New Orleans
- yells in the middle of the night
- freakishly empty restaurant
- a car being pushed along by another car
- too many onions in one day
- the video game city of Houston (looks like nighttime downtowns in first person shooters)
- the largest puppy I ever loved (no, I'm not calling him fat)
- puppy logs!
- the Airport departing gate traffic Nazi which combined with
- the Engineer's neck crick proved to be quite humorous (after the events that transpired)
- The Hobbit Cafe! Yay!
- Restaurant waiter/waitress issues
- the Gregarious Kid during Egyptian Rat Screw...scary!
- the Engineer's magic trick with his glass of smoothie and a paper towel
- Hairspray (yes the movie with Travolta dressed as a woman!)
- BRAWL! (Smash Bros.)
- No World of Warcraft! (by choice)
- Losing my voice
- Watching the Kid touch her eye to point out the location of the lacrimal duct when she hadn't washed her hands after eating stuff with jalapenos.
- Crone-voice (myself when I didn't have a real voice)
- Coffee with my friends near a railroad when I barely had a voice
- Getting excited as we came upon the last hour of our trip
- Falling onto a bed for ten minutes post-trip
Sunday, March 16, 2008
One Hundred and Twenty-two, 2,222 Miles
Here I sit after having completed a trip that would have taken me from New York City all the way to Salt Lake City. Yeah, I would have a bit of a rush right now if I didn't have class to prepare for tomorrow. Previous to this my longest road trips usually spanned ~500 miles one way up to see my uncle and my baby cousin Valiben. And if I had to make it alone, I think I would have a tough time of it. But this time, I had one of the kids with me and we had a grand time driving down. She even curbed her sleeping time in the vehicle to about an hour. Considering that in previous trips she conks out for entire two or three hours trips, to go on only an hour of sleep during an 9 hours drive was impressive!
We are back in our respective towns now. It felt odd when I last saw her. I felt this surge of emotion over the new bond we've formed through this experience. At the end of it there was this...sadness that the great adventure is stopping. When I drove out of The Kids' town this morning, it was with a heavy heart. She knew she would be returning to her studies and that I would be taking on a new Block of material and that the gung-ho attitudes of Spring Break would fade away, but it was still hard to face it head-on.
And it was exactly what I needed. It was my largest adventure since two years ago when seven of us went up and crashed at my uncle's and visited his area. We got to see both the Beatnik and the Engineer on this trip and while it wasn't for as long as any of us would have liked, it was better than not going and staying home and vegetating while reading books or playing computer games. Sometimes I like it, and this might have been a good week for me to veg out, but I'm damn glad I went on this trip.
We are back in our respective towns now. It felt odd when I last saw her. I felt this surge of emotion over the new bond we've formed through this experience. At the end of it there was this...sadness that the great adventure is stopping. When I drove out of The Kids' town this morning, it was with a heavy heart. She knew she would be returning to her studies and that I would be taking on a new Block of material and that the gung-ho attitudes of Spring Break would fade away, but it was still hard to face it head-on.
And it was exactly what I needed. It was my largest adventure since two years ago when seven of us went up and crashed at my uncle's and visited his area. We got to see both the Beatnik and the Engineer on this trip and while it wasn't for as long as any of us would have liked, it was better than not going and staying home and vegetating while reading books or playing computer games. Sometimes I like it, and this might have been a good week for me to veg out, but I'm damn glad I went on this trip.
One Hundred and Twenty-one, Abandoned? Part Deux
So after escaping the zombies in the small town in Louisiana, we came upon a Popeye's fast food place. Upon going in, I glance at the menu, wince and ask the cashier hesitantly,
"Are the red beans and rice vegetarian?"
"No"
"Uhh...do you have anything vegetarian?"
The cashier paused, then glanced over to her right at the drive-thru lady.
"Do we have anything vegetarian?"
The drive-thru lady also pauses in her activity of putting an order in a to-go bag. She glances back at the manager in the back.
"Do we have anything vegetarian?" She asks.
The manager looks up at me confused. She ponders the menu selections which she knows by heart. Then a lightning bolt hits!
"We can make the red beans and rice without the sausage gravy. That's vegetarian." And now that she has one, she's on a roll. "We also have coleslaw. No? Ok, there are onion rings as well."
My eyes lit up at these, the first option that sounded appetizing. I had Popeye's for lunch that day, and it consisted of an order of onion rings and a fast-food Mississippi Mud Cake. Not an experience I hope to re-create anytime soon.
"Are the red beans and rice vegetarian?"
"No"
"Uhh...do you have anything vegetarian?"
The cashier paused, then glanced over to her right at the drive-thru lady.
"Do we have anything vegetarian?"
The drive-thru lady also pauses in her activity of putting an order in a to-go bag. She glances back at the manager in the back.
"Do we have anything vegetarian?" She asks.
The manager looks up at me confused. She ponders the menu selections which she knows by heart. Then a lightning bolt hits!
"We can make the red beans and rice without the sausage gravy. That's vegetarian." And now that she has one, she's on a roll. "We also have coleslaw. No? Ok, there are onion rings as well."
My eyes lit up at these, the first option that sounded appetizing. I had Popeye's for lunch that day, and it consisted of an order of onion rings and a fast-food Mississippi Mud Cake. Not an experience I hope to re-create anytime soon.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
One Hundred and Twenty, Giggly
We think a little sip* of the EtOH took over and enforced giggliness upon the young one. She still maintains that it was the goofy evening of playing Swap and Egyptian Rat Screw that brought it on, but the Engineer and I know better [sagely nods all around]. After consulting with the Engineer's All-knowing oracular Spirit, we found the opportune time to go to bed. Good thing I never asked it when I had to go to bed! Here I be away from it all and having a great time with these folks. Others are missed, but I'm taking it all in down here while I can. All too soon, the great sojourn back home will begin. Until then, adieu!
*mixed into a smoothie forsooth
*mixed into a smoothie forsooth
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
One Hundred and Nineteen, Abandoned?
We just wanted some grub before we began the second long driving leg of our trip. So we headed out towards a plantation outside of New Orleans. Arriving at the exit, we drove around looking for a local place to eat at. So we come upon a local restaurant sign and follow it back down a windy driveway with other residential driveways branching off. If I had to live there it would be neat but as a visitor, weaving between the wide, shady Louisianian oak trees was a little creepy. We reach the end of the drive at a gravel parking lot and an open door next to the restaurant's sign. We glance at each other, take a deep breath, and step out of the car. As we approach, there is no sign of life other than the open, dark doorway. We reach the door and step inside expecting a quiet place preparing for their lunch crowd. A large open floor greets us. Chairs are stacked up on the left, some tables are up against a wall on the right, and the air of disuse assails us. Light filters in from wall of windows on the right showing us the dusty air and the lack of any human being. Again, we glance at each other and simultaneously back through the door. As we reach the car and I drive out, we muse how we would not have been surprised if zombies began shambling out of the back doorways into the main room coming after us, "Brains....Brains..."
We drove away quickly, glad that we had escaped the grasp of the undead hooligans. Next on the adventure was going to be finding something vegetarian at Popeye's fast food joint!
We drove away quickly, glad that we had escaped the grasp of the undead hooligans. Next on the adventure was going to be finding something vegetarian at Popeye's fast food joint!
Saturday, March 8, 2008
One Hundred and Eighteen, Hittin' the Road!
Spring Break is here! I'm on the road with A Kid...[*sniff*]. Posts sparser than ever!
Thursday, March 6, 2008
One Hundred and Seventeen, Midnight Puja!
I've been to a decent number of Catholic Masses in my life (my best friends growing up were all Catholic) and I noticed some similarities in midnight celebrations. Depending on which calendar you look at, either March 5th or 6th is Shivratri. That and Janmashtami are the big nighttime celebrations for me in my faith. Both religions have their intricate rituals. Both tend to have some aspect of explanation of the day or the hopes of the priests in how the night will change our patterns for the better. Everyone is rapt with the religious fervor that only comes about by being surrounded by hundreds (or in my case at midnight, tens) of people of like mind who are reveling in it to the same degree as yourself. I went with the intention of heading out after a couple hours. I stayed until 12:30 AM helping to clean up in the last 20 minutes. Even that was peaceful and enjoyable. To know that the work you do is benefiting your place of worship does make a difference in the quality of my work. The passion that is missing at home comes forth when there. I belt out the bhajans with the rest of them and if I happen to get off-key, I fix myself as best as I can without worrying that I'll bring apart the whole fabric that we've sewn together. Whether immigrants or natural citizens here in the US, our faith binds us in ways others might not get to experience.
Monday, March 3, 2008
One Hundred and Sixteen, An Inquisitive Gentleman Who Was
The beady eyes bore through the lenses into my eyes.
"So tell me what you do!"
I explained how I was in engineering school hoping to enter medicine.
"Medicine! Such a fine field! You should work hard to become a good doctor."
I sheepishly glance around the room letting it sit upon my second cousin once removed beseeching her to save me from this senile gentleman.
"So how do you plan to use your electrical engineering in medicine? Research on the electrical signals of the heart or brain? Or going more into imaging? There's plenty of money in imaging and radiotherapies! I know a couple companies that produce medical equipment and they're at the top of the markets these days!"
My head whips around quickly. Here was a man I'd never underestimate again. This man, a repository of knowledge stretching back 80-some years, kept going inquiring about specifics some which I'd know and others I would have to admit of having no knowledge. And it was all interesting! The intensity he used to speak to you made you aware that You mattered and your thoughts on his topics were of the utmost importance to him.
After seeing him back in 2000 and experiencing him for the first time, I began seeing him once each time I went back to India. 2000, 2002, 2004, 2005 -- I met him a total of four times. Yet we imprinted ourselves on each other. I always asked after his health whenever I would talk to my relatives there. And they'd let me know how he always inquired about "that nice boy who chatted with me the one time." We met four times yet for some reason we remembered each other and always asked after each other.
Yeah, it got to me too.
आवता जन्ममा मलीसू दादा।
"So tell me what you do!"
I explained how I was in engineering school hoping to enter medicine.
"Medicine! Such a fine field! You should work hard to become a good doctor."
I sheepishly glance around the room letting it sit upon my second cousin once removed beseeching her to save me from this senile gentleman.
"So how do you plan to use your electrical engineering in medicine? Research on the electrical signals of the heart or brain? Or going more into imaging? There's plenty of money in imaging and radiotherapies! I know a couple companies that produce medical equipment and they're at the top of the markets these days!"
My head whips around quickly. Here was a man I'd never underestimate again. This man, a repository of knowledge stretching back 80-some years, kept going inquiring about specifics some which I'd know and others I would have to admit of having no knowledge. And it was all interesting! The intensity he used to speak to you made you aware that You mattered and your thoughts on his topics were of the utmost importance to him.
After seeing him back in 2000 and experiencing him for the first time, I began seeing him once each time I went back to India. 2000, 2002, 2004, 2005 -- I met him a total of four times. Yet we imprinted ourselves on each other. I always asked after his health whenever I would talk to my relatives there. And they'd let me know how he always inquired about "that nice boy who chatted with me the one time." We met four times yet for some reason we remembered each other and always asked after each other.
Yeah, it got to me too.
आवता जन्ममा मलीसू दादा।
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