One Hundred and Fourty-five, A Poem Reading

"Our love began with a glance across a parking lot.
You possessed me in just a few days.
I remember long drives through the countryside,
And long weekend getaways.

But the years passed, and like upholstery in the hot sun,
Your love began to fade.
And now in a time when I need your care the most,
You hit the blinker and turn away.

And while our gas tank of love may be running on fumes,
I still have plenty of love to share.
So if you have a quart of tenderness left for me in your heart,
Take me back to Firestone Complete Auto Care."

Roommate received the above poem signed, "Love, Your 2000 Neon." Yeah, corny, yet strangely hilarious!

One Hundred and Fourty-four, Energy

I have energy. We all have energy. It's just a question of how you use it.

One Hundred and Fourty-three, Seat of My Pants

Maybe it's an unconscious way my mind tries to bring excitement to my calm, ordered life. I don't care for this particular excitement. For most of my education, I've ridden an edge. At first it was the A/B edge in grades. Then in college, it was the B/C edge. Now in medical school, where there aren't letter grades, it's the P/F edge. Even now, I sit here having calculated out my grade for the unsure course. It's on the edge. There is one unaccounted-for grade which should push me over into the "safe" zone but it's definitely nerve-wracking. It's been like this since I started in Fall 2006. As always, I keep faith that what's right for me is what will happen, whether I agree with it or not at the time.

One Hundred and Fourty-two, One Hundred Thumbs Up!

Exams this week. Sparse am I.

One Hundred and Fourty-one, Surrounded Yet Alone

Back in October the Engineer celebrated his birthday far away from us all by himself in Texas. In February, the Beatnik looked like he would end up celebrating his birthday in Louisiana far away from us, but the Engineer went up to see him that night. Today I went out in the evening with Roommate, Amish Girl, and another classmate to dinner and dessert.

I didn't realize until today how awesome it was that the Engineer and Beatnik were able to hang out together over something as simple as marking the day one of them popped into this world. I didn't realize until today what it meant to be able to spend part of that day hanging out with each other. I didn't realize until today some part of what it might have felt like to celebrate your birthday on your own. I realized today that we've been celebrating birthdays together since late elementary school. This is the first year where we couldn't all be together for each of our days. I've been receiving endless phone calls today, but only four uplifted me: Valiben, Engineer, Beatnik, and Lord Chaos with the family singing Happy Birthday.

I'm surrounded by great people, but I can't change the fact that I miss the people I've known for most of my life.

One Hundred and Fourty, Dazed and Not Confused

I love moving my body to music. But having had little experience in unknown crowds with it, I get a bit apprehensive about it. Amongst people I know and care about it's much easier and if they happen to be dancing as strangely as I manage, even better. The Beatnik has a saying, "Indians dance whiter than white guys." I think that says it all. Yet whenever I'm with him and the others that comprise my companionship and we're all being goofy, I don't care as much; and it's awesome.

One Hundred and Thirty-nine, Obdurate?

For years, I have this little game of hiding my birthday from the world and congratulating those who successfully remembered it. Some part of me was joyful at this minor power play to see who would be as psuedo-OCD as me and keep track of my birthday. Another part of me just didn't care as much. Growing up birthdays were signified by a sumptuous meal and a visit to the temple. Yeah, my American friends would have grandiose parties and eventually I tried emulating them but my heart was never in it.

This year my birthday will be lost in a weekend where I will be helping throw a charity concert and resting from a hectic week and driving home for a couple nights. One of my best friends is in Texas; the other in California. What I want doesn't necessarily factor into what I get. I want second year to be over and a month off before starting third year rotations. Instead, I'll be working hard to pass my classes. I'll be working hard to pass Step 1 of my Board Exams. I want to go to Chris' town where a gathering will commence on the first of the next month. Instead I'll probably be doing some much-needed vegging-out after a heavy week of studying. I want to be fifteen again. Instead I'll be turning twenty-six.

One Hundred and Thirty-eight, Unconscious

It's been a while since I've awakened from a deep sleep with some random letters typed into an IM window leaving that person to wonder what text I've "entered." Tonight I had fkdjcxm. Oh yeah...

One Hundred and Thirty-seven, Mortal Combat - The Pit Stage

obtained from Here

For the past couple months, a certain area of my room was slowly turning into the Mortal Combat level of yesteryear. Up high on my throne I felt nothing until I went to lay my bare feet down on the floor. Splintered plastic stuck up at odd angles out of the floor mat, threatening flesh and fabric alike. Every roll of the chair caused a cacophony of cracks to fill the apartment. My roommate has attested to hearing me rolling around after he's gone to bed.

Be that as it may, I kept it, in true Indian fashion, until it died. Not just died but hemorrhaged out onto my hands. That day of death was when I rolled forward sending a roller through a hole in the mat. Upon rolling back out later on, I pulled the mat apart. Needless to say, I spent the next five minutes rolling together the falling apart mat. It now sits in an empty bean bag box waiting for its sojourn to the dumpster.

My feet caress the soft carpeting under my chair.

One Hundred and Thirty-six, Brown Sugary Goodness

I got brownies today for doing a good deed! Huzzah! Brownies are always a reason to celebrate, unless they were made by practicing cannibals. As for the rest of life, it's still rushing by at a frantic speed. As I tell others, just one step at a time.

In other news, this exclusive interview of Neville Longbottom caught my attention today. Read it to get an interesting perspective into the wizarding world as reported by Heather! Anne!

One Hundred and Thirty-five, A Masterpiece

I read a lot. But I don't read a lot. I delve into strange, amazing worlds whether they involve magic or spacelanes. I don't read much "normal" fiction mainly because it doesn't hold my attention as well as the well-described worlds in the science-fiction and fantasy novels. Still, sometimes when I read a regular novel, I can appreciate its importance in the fabric of people's lives.

Catch-22 is Joseph Heller's Magnum Opus.

Everyone I've talked to who has read it has only good things to say. Even I feel something different when I read this book. Not just the emotion stirred up but the feeling of being on an immense ride through the author's psyche to experience the same mental climax that he must have experienced. It is such a primal sense of satisfaction when you finish that novel. I loved the book when I read it first some half a decade ago but I'd forgotten why I loved it. Today, I remembered, if only for the last couple chapters of the book, why and I reveled in it. As an escapist, I'm proud to say that I did realize while reading Catch-22 how well-written and powerful this book is. Catch-22 helps define why sometimes people change their lives because of novels.

One Hundred and Thirty-four, Highlights of Tonight

"Everything is upside down!"

This one came up when the precious boy laid down on the floor of the hotel and looked up at a tree which, from that angle, looked upside down.


"Your face is fuzzy!"

I'm carrying him and his arm brushes up against my unshaven chin. Without looking, he begins to slowly rub his arm against my chin. He then brings his hands up to my face and slowly rubs my short bear/heavy stubble. The entire process was involuntary since his attention was elsewhere in the hotel.


"This rock makes music!"

While the adults chat about other matters (like the recent road trip to Texas) the little boy cocks his head at something he can barely hear. Slowly he stands up on his booth seat and walks to the side with a decorative holder containing some plants and some rocks including one huge one. He leans in and changes his head position a couple times before turning back to us and telling us his wonderful discover.

One Hundred and Thirty-three, The Antigloaming

I went to bed at a reasonable time last night and while I had some trouble getting up, it was nothing like what I've had to deal with when I'm running on less than two hours of sleep. Today I ended up snoozing for only 45 minutes and then was functioning properly. I even noticed the water deposited overnight on the window next to my bed.

As I pulled out of the parking lot, the sky had that look of starting to brighten. I noticed a junkyard's electromagnet crane which looked like it was illuminated with sunshine but in reality it was a set of bright lights set upon it (so the operators could see the junk they were moving easily?). The drive in was to Wax Fang's "At Sea" and I just floated into the parking lot. The walk to school was to the start of the Nurse Duckett chapter of Catch-22 (and me humming "At Sea"). I put my jacket away in my locker trying to recall which lecture I had this morning at 8:00 AM. If I recall correctly, it was CNS - Reading Time. Oh... I guess I don't have class for an hour. My head's personal April Fool's joke.

To Blog!